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  #1  
Old 08-21-2005, 08:51 PM
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EvilCheeseWedge EvilCheeseWedge is offline
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Alice Cooper -- Detroit, MI -- August 21st, 2005

TOUR: Dirty Diamonds Tour
VENUE: Michigan State Fair -- Detroit, MI
DATE: Sunday, August 21, 2005
REVIEWED: Monday, August 22, 2005

I went up to the Michigan State Fair to see Alice Cooper for the third straight summer in a row. I’ve seen him in several interesting places… a zoo, an up-scale theater, and now a state fair. Anyways, my friends Kristin and Jay went with me. They showed up around 11:30 AM and I drove us to Kristin’s dad’s house, where we were served lunch. We hit the road for Michigan around 1:15 PM. I’m not sure exactly when we got to the fair, because, you see, we had a few de-tours that involved Best Buy on the way. It was probably around 3:30 – 3:45 PM when we got there.

Once we arrived, we paid $5 to park and $9 each for admission. That was the extent of the costs involved, which isn’t bad. We went to stake the venue out. It was inside an arena; it looked nice enough. One unfortunate aspect of the show was there was no line. None. So despite the fact we waited for two hours for doors, it was just a literal stampede, as several times the state police moved people around. The mad rush was annoying, and cost us a good spot. We ended up on the floor. I would say a little before the middle. Probably the worst spot I’ve had for a Cooper concert.

Opening the show was… the Virgin Mary grilled cheese sandwich from GoldenPalace.com. Seriously. They had the sandwich there, and not only that, but had a grilled cheese eating competition with two professionals, and several Michigan amateurs for some qualification or something. One of the eaters managed to eat 21 grilled cheese sandwiches in, I think it was 12 minutes. Weird. It was sure more interesting then the Detroit local band that opened for Alice. They hit the stage at 7 PM and lasted for 30 minutes, which, by all accounts, was too long. I didn’t catch their name, but can say it was mostly the same riff overtop of some screaming. Lovely. The acoustics in this venue, we noted, were terrible. We began to fear for Alice.

Alice Cooper hit the stage at 8 PM with the intro tape “Phantom of the Opera”. Acoustics were still terrible. Alice’s band was, in a word, tight. Probably the tightest I’ve seen them yet (and each year the line-up has changed.) Alice sounded great too. He’s definitely an impressive fellow, considering his age. Him and Dio need to get another tour package together. Alice played four songs off his new album, Dirty Diamonds. They were all great… it was weird to hear them though, since the album’s only been out since the 2nd. It just felt weird to already be hearing them live. Can’t argue though.

Alice could really teach a lot of bands about changing the set list too. I’ve seen him three times, and for the most part, there’s always been lots of changes, and definitely some surprises as Alice does change from night to night.

The bottom line was Alice threw it down beautifully for about an hour and half, even if the acoustics stunk to high heaven.

What about the audience? Well, I’m glad you asked. Fuck you Detroit. Wait. Fuck you Michigan. I’ve had it with the state. I have vowed that this Cooper show is the last one I’ll attend in that wretched state (unless Dio hits up Harpo’s again…) – either way, the audience was terrible. Oh sure, they were into Alice… blah, blah, blah, but they were mostly assholes.

Less then half way into the show, this gargantuan “woman” decides to stand on her chair in front of me. Now remember, I’m on the floor, and this floor don’t slope. I have no where to go. All I can see is roll after roll of flaggy fat. I yell, and yell, and she turns around and says, “Fuck you” and we start giving each other the finger. People behind me start cussing her out to. She was barraged with comments such, as “Why don’t you get something to eat and get your fat out of our face?” It was terrible. I just hate people like this. She was tall enough to see fine, but it felt better to fuck over the people behind her. Some older lady next to me, pulled me over and said, “What a bitch…” and offered to let me stand where she was so I could see. I declined, it’s not her fault that fatty felt the need to block my view, but I was really impressed by the gesture. Thank you!

Anyways, after a while, I was able to move over enough to get out of Fatty’s way… well, then she gets her friend up on the chairs, and she turns around, points me out to her friend, and they make sure to obstruct my view. I didn’t see Alice in his straightjacket. I didn’t see him get his head cut off. Hell, I only saw half of one guitarist for most of the show. It was only for the encores I regained my vision.

I have never been so angry at a gig. My friend was pelting her with coins. I didn’t do anything, but I came close to snapping. There was nowhere I could go, and there was no reason for her to be on that chair (well, two, gotta spread that weight around, you know?) - It was awful and really tarnished the evening. It really adds to all the other wonderful things like this that have happened to us in Detroit, and Michigan concerts in general. From now on, we’re sticking to Ohio.

Overall, it was a good show. But I wouldn’t go back. I love Alice, and I’ll catch him next time he’s around, but I’ll go see him in Ohio. And I’ll gladly pay more to do it…

This set might not be 100% accurate, but I’ll edit it and let you know as I firm it up….

Phantom of the Opera (Intro Tape)
1. Dirty Diamonds
2. Billion Dollar Babies
3. No More Mr. Nice Guy
4. Be My Lover
5. Lost In America
6. I Never Cry
7. Woman Of Mass Distraction
8. I’m Eighteen
9. Between High School and Old School
10. Steal That Car
11. Is It My Body
12. Go To Hell
13. Black Widow Jam (Inc. Drum solo)
14. Gimme
15. Feed My Frankenstein
16. Welcome To My Nightmare
17. "The Piece" (Includes The Awakening / Steven / Only Women Bleed / Ballad Of Dwight Fry / Killer)
18. I Love The Dead (Band vocal only)
19. School's Out

ENCORE

20. Poison
21. Sunset Babies (All Have Rabies)
22. Under My Wheels
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  #2  
Old 08-21-2005, 09:59 PM
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HOT DAMN! THAT'S A FUCKING GIG REPORT!

I wish they had a grilled cheese contest at any context I attended... I would be all over that... grilled cheese fucking rules!

Hell, you should have coaxed your obstructions down with sandwiches...
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Old 08-21-2005, 10:02 PM
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EvilCheeseWedge EvilCheeseWedge is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hot_turkey_ed
HOT DAMN! THAT'S A FUCKING GIG REPORT!

I wish they had a grilled cheese contest at any context I attended... I would be all over that... grilled cheese fucking rules!

Hell, you should have coaxed your obstructions down with sandwiches...
Yeah, I've never seen anything like it... I've seen the $28,000 Virgin Mary grilled cheese sandwhich - that will be something to tell the kids!

We've just had an unbelivable amount of bad luck in Michigan, from ridiculous construction delays, to being driven into by assholes, to the view obstructions... every time we go up to Michigan it's something.

I think I'm going to make up for this by going to see the Metal Insurgence tour in two weeks... in OHIO!
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Old 08-22-2005, 05:40 PM
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I'm going to see Alice Cooper tomorrow.
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Old 08-22-2005, 06:37 PM
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EvilCheeseWedge EvilCheeseWedge is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Bloodcurse
I'm going to see Alice Cooper tomorrow.
Hell yeah
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