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Old 06-05-2013, 05:14 PM
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JRA JRA is offline
The metal purist the scenekids complain about
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 20,359
There are 5 problems with this album:

1) It should have been produced by Mr. Necroticism himself, Colin Richardson. Bob Rock is a mainstream rock producer, not a metal producer. People say the drums are annoying, but honestly, the guitars are much much worse. Take the horrible With Fear I Kiss The Burning Darkness guitar tone and give it mainstream production and you have St. Anger.

2) It was too long. The album shouldn't have been longer than 47:22.

3) Was filled to the brim with trendy modern bullshit. They wanted to be Slipknot/Limp Bizkit/System of a Down so bad and it was disgusting. (I tried to listen to the album in full for the first time in years and when I got to Some Kind of Monster I fell over laughing because it sounded like Godsmack trying to be Satanic).

4) The horrible lyrics. The word "healthy" should never, ever appear in metal. Actually now that I think about it, it shouldn't be a lyric in music in general. When Sir-Mix-A-Lot sings "shake that healthy butt" it douche-chills my boner right into the ground.

5) Stupid clean guitar passages. You assholes had almost 19 years of being "artistic" and "forward moving" and "multi-dimensional" and whatever other bullshit buzzwords you used to try and convince your fans you weren't Motley Crue with less songwriting talent. 200 bpm or leave the hall.

Solos? Napalm Death never laid down a single guitar solo in their lives and made better albums than this crap. Though Kirk's remark in the movie about how not putting guitar solos on the album "dates it to this time period" was priceless.

Fun fact: Kashmir doesn't have a guitar solo. Neither does Hammer Smashed Face.
George W. Bush is the son of a swine. I hope that one day his body is identified by the teeth marks on my penis.

Last edited by JRA; 06-05-2013 at 05:17 PM.
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