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Old 07-29-2008, 06:24 PM
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ChildrenofSodom ChildrenofSodom is offline
Regretting my username
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: CA
Posts: 12,259
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mankvill View Post
i'm laughing too hard to do anythign witty
Do you accept your demise? If you refuse, I will crush you into Angel Dust. I will take the role of annihilator. I will put anthrax in your mail. While you play your games unsuspectingly, I will burn you in the arcade fire. You are my arch enemy. An armored saint you are not. I will destroy you at all cost, for I am an atheist, and I have no conscience to stop me from committing an atrocity. Many aspiring killers will ask for my autograph, and I will give it to them, as an Autumn offering. The queenly baroness shall cry at the sight of your corpse on that once barren cross. The beatles will crawl through your decaying flesh like termites through wood. I will make you a believer, and I beseech you: heed my words, or I will take you beyond fear. The black tide of death will bring misery and pain to your life. You will swim in the bloodbath! The wailers will cry of your suffering. As I sit here, I brainstorm all the ways to slay you. I want to make the murder very inexpensive, I dont want to be breaking benjamins. In fact, in order to save money on the funeral, I will kill two other men, so that you can all be a burial chamber trio. And in that graveyard, you will be buried inside. Your carcass will be burnt by the sun, and you will be marinated in that crimson glory.

No cinderella story for you. You were not a clutch under pressure; you could not return my volley of puns. I suppose you are not used to such comedy; you have been corrupted by mainstream society. That is the corrosion of conformity. But I offer the cure. I can reverse that damageplan. I can steal you away from that dark tranquility, your darkest hour, at the dawn of solace, not as the daylight dies. I have the magic skills comparable to those of demons and wizards. I can turn back the hour hand on your death clock. I will spare your soul, i will not dismember you. I will help you, if you kneel down before me here on this Earth. I have a friend, this Ed guy, that knows a thing or two about music. He works at wal-mart, stocking the m&m section. And he can help you, your life will not be for-ever grey.

Explosions in the sky will signal the fall of serenity: fates warning. Your mind may become a fear factory, but do not be tricked by these events. The firefighters at the firehouse will deal with those problems. They will deal with the force of evil. From first to last. The gathering of myself, you, and this ed guy will be our genesis, of a new life. So GODSPEED YOU! I shall act as your grave digger, and return you to life, the great white life of the dark lord. Heaven shall burn at the sight of your return, to the hell within. Don't forget to wear your helmet. And bring plenty of pipes, because down in hell, we are going to get high on fire, with Him. And when the fires of hell are exstinguished on that fateful day, there will an iced earth awaiting of arrival. For we are immortal. We gained this status using an immortal technique, that will take us forever into eternity, in flames, and we will nevermore fear death.

The sword we use to crush the gates of hell will be forged with iron made in Damascus, the strongest of steel from that orphaned land. I hear rumor they used similar swords in camelot. There is little need for use to travel the whole world. For example, there is no cataclysm that would force us to go to Kansas. For we would experience catatonia there.

And we will carry goodluck charms, such as rabbits feet and kid panda hands, so that the creator cannot harm us. We will set our killswitch to engage and create a kingdom of sorrow.
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