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View Full Version : Iron Maiden, Cinderella, and Boris


zgodt
08-10-2010, 07:24 AM
Howdy, folks. I hope and trust you've all been well.

I have a column today in Ann Arbor's facsimile of a city newspaper, in which I discuss talking with my kids about Iron Maiden and then, unfortunately, hair metal. If anybody's interested, check it out: http://www.annarbor.com/entertainment/parenting/how-not-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-aquanet-and-80s-music/

In other news, I'm going to see Boris tonight in Detroit. :horns:

DethMaiden
08-10-2010, 07:30 AM
It makes me sick how much better you are at writing than I'll ever be. :lol: Great column, man. Keep 'em coming. :fist:

powerslave_85
08-10-2010, 07:34 AM
Holy shit that was funny :lol:

Good to see you back, Scott :horns:

zgodt
08-10-2010, 07:44 AM
Good to see you dudes as well.

SomewhereInTime72
08-10-2010, 09:03 AM
Good read! :lol:

SirLardsAlot
08-10-2010, 09:27 AM
:party:

JRA
08-10-2010, 09:47 AM
The reason everyone thought hair metal sucked is because they were all third rate knock-off's of Van Halen. Androgeny(sp?) might have a hand in it, but it was ultimately a small piece of the puzzle. David Lee Roth was of course one of the best frontmen of all time, but he wore some downright gay shit. That's not an insult, it's the truth. Richard Simmons, Liberace, Freddy Mercury and Tom Cruise would look at one of his typical outfits of the 80's and exclaim "Jesus cum-guzzling christ that's gay!" But I digress.

The hairbands sucked not only because, well...their music sucks, but they were all carbon copies of what came before. The lead singer was always doing something "outrageous" the guitarist was always a souless technical wizard who can tap six ways to sunday, it was all a formula, which like all formulas would get old very quickly. I guarantee that if tommorow the mainstream market flooded with Immortal and Bathory knockoff's people would get sick of that shit by the end of the year.

I also agree with kids being spiteful little poopnuggets who constantly contradict out of spite. In my not so educated opinion, there are two ways of dealing with this:

1) Come in the room dancing and lip-synching to this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKDhRSShZkg

2) or they are clearly not feeling the sting of the pimp hand. You should do something about that.

Citatet
08-10-2010, 10:26 AM
1) Come in the room dancing and lip-synching to this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKDhRSShZkg


I might be stupid but this is really a joke, right? Or should I say lampoon?

JLRedWing13
08-10-2010, 02:42 PM
Howdy, folks. I hope and trust you've all been well.

I have a column today in Ann Arbor's facsimile of a city newspaper, in which I discuss talking with my kids about Iron Maiden and then, unfortunately, hair metal. If anybody's interested, check it out: http://www.annarbor.com/entertainment/parenting/how-not-to-talk-to-your-kids-about-aquanet-and-80s-music/

In other news, I'm going to see Boris tonight in Detroit. :horns:
Well written. Ann Arbor is a great place, btw, but I may be a little biased. :lol:

powerslave_85
08-10-2010, 03:12 PM
BTW, Scott, a good friend of mine is moving to Ann Arbor. If I'm ever in the neighborhood, let's grab a beer :metal:

zgodt
08-10-2010, 10:36 PM
BTW, Scott, a good friend of mine is moving to Ann Arbor. If I'm ever in the neighborhood, let's grab a beer :metal:
For real, man -- let me know if/when you're ever planning to swing through.

zgodt
08-10-2010, 10:42 PM
The reason everyone thought hair metal sucked is because they were all third rate knock-off's of Van Halen. Androgeny(sp?) might have a hand in it, but it was ultimately a small piece of the puzzle. David Lee Roth was of course one of the best frontmen of all time, but he wore some downright gay shit. That's not an insult, it's the truth. Richard Simmons, Liberace, Freddy Mercury and Tom Cruise would look at one of his typical outfits of the 80's and exclaim "Jesus cum-guzzling christ that's gay!" But I digress.

The hairbands sucked not only because, well...their music sucks, but they were all carbon copies of what came before. The lead singer was always doing something "outrageous" the guitarist was always a souless technical wizard who can tap six ways to sunday, it was all a formula, which like all formulas would get old very quickly. I guarantee that if tommorow the mainstream market flooded with Immortal and Bathory knockoff's people would get sick of that shit by the end of the year.

I also agree with kids being spiteful little poopnuggets who constantly contradict out of spite. In my not so educated opinion, there are two ways of dealing with this:

1) Come in the room dancing and lip-synching to this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKDhRSShZkg

2) or they are clearly not feeling the sting of the pimp hand. You should do something about that.

I dunno. You say it's not an insult, but I can't fathom what would make an outfit somehow objectively "gay". Care to elaborate, or should we just move on?

Also -- there are a million crummy bands like Puddle of Mudd and Three Doors Down and Godsmack which are all bullshit carbon copies of the first wave grunge bands of the early 90s, and none of them have ever been reviled half as much as hair metal. So there's got to be more to hair-metal-hate than the fact that Van Halen got there first.

JRA
08-11-2010, 09:19 PM
"Yeah the music is horrible.. that's why Appetite For Destruction is the best selling debut album in the US and Bon Jovi is still selling out arenas/stadiums worldwide 20 years after their heyday."

The jackass who wrote this comment posts on Sludge and he is a faggot asshole troll. I so wish I could reach through my computer screen and strangle him.